Why today? Why now?

“Be someone more interesting tomorrow than you are today.”

When I read that quote advertised by Cole Haan yesterday, I thought, “oh my gee, I’ve been so uninteresting!!!” Particularly here on my non-active blog. Everything creative in me has been cooped up in my mind when I have you avid readers waiting. So with that said, I’m so sorry, everyone! Sorry for the stubby fingernails caused by anxious nibbling and the sleepless nights that you were up waiting for a post that never came 😉 I’m back.

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(And i apologize for the future apologies)

Just to be totally open and honest with you, though, I really could’ve done this a while ago.  I’ve just been afraid. I guess it’s kinda ridiculous that I’m afraid of my virtual, unseen fans but its true. My mind overtakes me sometimes (ahem..ok many times) and I was thinking that I had already gotten so behind that one more day didn’t matter. Till one day turned into 4 months! Cray. But I know you guys can empathize–there’s probably something out there right now that  you’ve yet to complete because you’re afraid or you’re so late or whatever. Well if I can do this, you can do that. Go get it! Now that was a morning musing right there.

Now about my life right here, right now. It has actually been legitimately crazy. Soo much going on so I’ll do a quick briefer of each thing.

For one, right after the last posting, I was caught up in the craze of planning my own big 25th bday bash. I had a blast and i felt so beautiful and loved and all that but seriously?!  Never again–till my wedding. I’m used to planning events but once it’s your event, you’re emotionally invested and you’re taking everything very personally. Never in my life had I felt so needy and harried and never had I learned so much about myself in a short period of time. In spite of the craziness and life unintentional  lessons, it was great.

Here’s how I look normally, for those who don’t know me..and here’s how I looked on my bday (with my cute lil cuzzo) 🙂

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NORMAL (AT WORK)

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Ok. Makeup. This is the perfect segue from my party because it really hit me after the party  (thanks to Ms. gorgeously_gritty–check her out!!!) that “omg, makeup is art and I wanna do this.” Since then, I’ve taken a professional lesson from Ms. Gritty, have spent countless hours perusing through IG for inspiration and am really tryna enjoy this for the random beautiful ride that it is. I wonder where it will take me. Here are a few faces I’ve done since I started. Feel free to chuckle..lol..but I’m a proud mama

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the very first one I did

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Probably the fifth one I did..getting better, eh?

School. I’ve been kinda resistant to the idea of school because…ummm…yea it’s school…and then I started working at NYU which made me want to jump in school and do any program because employees get tuition assistance. Then I thought about it and decided to take baby steps. Even if its free, time is still valuable. So right now, I’m taking two classes in intellectual property law. Which is basically learning how creatives (like you and I) can legally protect their work. thinking about getting certified.

And all that leads me to the now, slightly confused but still striving 25-yr old that I am. This is such a tender emotional moment in my life–filled with such contradiction: growing hopes and a lot of doubt, departing youth and pending “real” adulthood. I’m not asking if you can relate because I KNOW you can. It’s kinda that point in life where we feel the yrs of being a cute 20-something-yr-old is quickly dwindling away and it’s time to get our lives together. In every way. And it’s scary to feel that way. I am literally in a time where I have to trust God in a way I never have before and have to find a way to believe that the best is yet to come. Or I won’t make it. So I encourage those of you who feel like this, as I encourage myself, to know that you’re not alone. We will one day look back, laugh and will help those who can now learn from us. That’s my dream.

Thats my today and now: The best is yet to come. Ttyl y’all. Much love!

Unknown

jonathanokanlawon.com

10 thoughts on “Why today? Why now?

  1. kurlymisstheintern says:

    I do admire your writing, conversational and witty! We’re at that stage where we have to conquer fear and let God, along with the gifts we are given, be our guide. “To much is given much is required”. We should expect a lot from you 2013!

    -Sid.
    ( my unknown and inactive blog )

    Liked by 1 person

    • LoLee says:

      Hey lilshay 🙂

      I think the best way to start, since I’m still in the starting stages myself, is to determine where you’re tryna go with makeup. Are you trying to be good just for you or for you AND others? Ultimately, you should start with yourself first but knowing where you want to go can determine your intensity of trying to learn.

      Now to your question..lol..start by heading to a mall and talking to one of the makeup counters–MAC is great. I think it’s important to have the absolute correct foundation and then experiment with everything else. Finding your foundation and taming or filling your brows are the basics..everything else is secondary..start there, YOUtube helps refresh your memory and practice. Send me a pic! 🙂

      Like

  2. Yodalis says:

    Love this!! The makeup looks great! And I’m so proud of you for deciding to take those law classes! So inspirational as usual!

    Like

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